


headache

by justanonlinelove



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:16:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27585325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanonlinelove/pseuds/justanonlinelove
Summary: past me hate mail





	headache

i hate old me

who i used to be

i was so stupid

it's like that one "i loved you i loved you i loved you it's true" tiktok because, well

"i was so stupid! and so abused"

i didn't realize that i was not at all in the right mental state for a relationship i spent months in constant fear that i'd mess something up and that's not really the right thought process to have my friends it's really not

also!! who let me have a fucking eating disorder what a dumbass move

i fucked shit up

nobody bothered to tell me there would be consequences i just wanted to be pretty

but now i'm a bit messed up

i think maybe i could have been taller than i am

and you know what else

i'm cold. all the fucking time

it sucks!! 

and i have low blood pressure idk what that really means but it's a thing

issues like that suck because i have no idea if recovery will cure them

it's a little late to do anything about it now though

also!!! 

why was i dumb enough to believe the things they told me

okay no

i'm not saying it was my fault that i got gaslighted

it's just a little bit funny in retrospect

i self harmed and made my initimacy issues worse that was weird

and i seriously abandoned two of the best people i've ever met 

i somehow convinced myself that was a smart move i thought they'd be happier

pure dumbass energy

things are better now though

so that's cool


End file.
